xenohomoroboislamotransaphobe

A friend texted this to me:

So I have big news, I’ve decided I’m a doctor, and I want everyone to start addressing me as such. Either Doctor Noble or just Doctor. I’m gonna get a white lab coat, carry a stethoscope, maybe get some scrubs. I’m not going to medical school or getting a degree in medicine, or really anything to acquire the skills and knowledge of other doctors, but I’ll resemble one on the outside and that coupled with my assertion that I am one, makes me a doctor. And if you offer anything less than your complete enthusiastic celebration you’re a bigoted xenohomoroboislamotransaphobe who’s worse than Mussolini!

Also everyone must agree that this is a perfectly healthy lifestyle choice and is no way unnatural. I’m simply forcing the outside to match how I feel on the inside, which in no way indicates a psychological disorder, even though the EXACT same sentiment is echoed by steroid abusers and people with anorexia.

Lastly, Transaphobic? Isn’t that already a thing? Isn’t fear of public transportation?

~ Jason N.